Notes of Faith August 30, 2026
Why Does God Allow Me to Doubt?
Jude 22 says,
Be merciful to those who doubt.
But it raises the question: why would God allow us to doubt to begin with?
Why does He allow us to wrestle with deep questions about life, prayer, theology, pain, and suffering? Why doesn’t he just clear the air, and give us the answers and evidence we need? Why is the journey of faith filled with so many unknowns?
Those are loaded questions. And perhaps Socrates had the best response: “I am ignorant of what I do not know.” But let me offer a suggestion:
What if God made the world like this to push us to deeper faith?
Frederick Buechner wrote, “Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith. They keep it awake and moving.”(i) I love that. Doubts can amplify our thirst for truth. For reality. They’re a doorway to intimacy. Doubts aren’t just an obstacle; they’re an opportunity. Uncertainty can lead us into the beautiful mystery we call God.
Jesus said the Spirit of God is like a wind that blows where it wishes (John 3:8). Wind can be gentle and healing, like a peaceful breeze on a summer’s day. Wind can also be a Category-5 hurricane that bulldozes everything in its path. David once said that God is our rest (Psalm 62:5). True, but He can also be the source of our distress. He is the answer, but He is also the question.
He welcomes us home, then blows the house down. He is unconventional, unpredictable, unrestrained, wild — and He has a particular disdain for boxes. In fact, the last time someone put Him in one, He broke out three days later.
Because God is always on the move, then it follows that our faith will be too. The story is told of Augustine, the brilliant fourth-century theologian, who was once walking along the beach lost in thought. He was attempting to wrap his mind around a theological question. He then saw a boy scurrying back and forth, carrying a seashell of water, emptying it into a hole he had dug in the sand. Augustine asked what he was doing. The boy told him: he was transporting the entire sea into the hole. Augustine laughed. That’s impossible! But then he realized that’s what he had been trying to do with God.
What if God made the world like this to push us to deeper faith?
Just when we think we’ve got God figured out, He vanishes. The more of Him we let into our lives, the faster He soaks through the limits of our understanding. And that’s why faith isn’t about getting God to fit into our holes in the sand; it’s about running to Him. He calls us not to the shore, but the ocean. He invites us to move past our fear and into His heart, deeper and deeper, until we experience His presence around us and in us. Faith isn’t about containment, it’s about possibility. Faith is skin-on-skin closeness, affinity, relationship. But to get there, sometimes our certainties need to be shattered. Our formulas disrupted. Our questions unanswered. And it’s there, in the depths of relationship, that we encounter not a list of religious clichés, but a Person. Friendship is born.
My wife Elyssa and I first met in the lobby of a church in the tiny town of Ruch, Oregon. Marriage has been an incredible ride. As we’ve done life together, I’ve learned a ton about who she is. I know her tastes, interests, hopes, anxieties, and (mostly!) can predict her moods. She used to be a cat person, but then we got a goldendoodle and she turned from the dark side. She likes flowers, and nature, and interior design. She’s a morning person, loves to paint, and is extroverted until she spends time with people. She’s kind, funny, and inexplicably loves sweet potatoes. She’s an amazing woman, and I married way out of my league. What I love about our relationship is that, although I know so much about her, there is still so much I’m learning. There are aspects to her story I’m just beginning to appreciate, glimpses of her personality that astonish me, ways she sees the world that I don’t expect. In so many ways, she is still an enigma to me.
Now, because I haven’t figured her out, should I be alarmed? Should I worry that the relationship is unhealthy or broken? Do we need counseling? That’s one way of looking at it. Another perspective is that the ambiguity in our relationship is actually a sign of health, passion, and a friendship that is moving forward. Certainty can restrict love. But subtlety gives it room to
flourish.
Consider beauty. Something is truly sublime when it takes you by surprise. You catch your breath and you can’t take your eyes away; you didn’t see it coming. Or think about humor. Wit is the art of verbalizing the unexpected. You laugh because it’s not anticipated.
Unknowns are what make life so unspeakably rich, iridescent, and engaging.
If I literally knew everything about my wife — every thought, insight, emotion, move, and placement of every atom — not only would that be slightly creepy, but it would also hinder the progression of love. For example, why ask her questions if I already know the answer? What is there to learn? Why seek her if she’s already been found? It’s because I don’t know everything that the relationship feels so alive. There are secrets waiting to be unearthed. Questions aching to be asked. Dimensions of her I have yet to fully explore or understand. It’s the pursuit of love that leads to the discovery of love.
Mystery is the lifeblood of intimacy.
The same thing is true in our relationship with God. What if God intentionally created a world in which doubt exists because He knew it would open the door to lasting, authentic love? What if God designed it in such a way — seeing “through a glass, darkly” (1 Corinthians 13:12 KJV) — so we would ache to see Him face-to-face? What if the meaning is in the longing? It’s easy to love God when He seems so close; but true love is the pursuit of love. The desire for His presence pushes us to greater depths.
If God is infinite, then there are infinite dimensions about Him to discover. Which means all it takes is a little obscurity, combined with curiosity, and the journey of faith begins.
(i) Frederick Buechner, Beyond Words: Daily Readings in the ABC’s of Faith (New York: Harper Collins, 2004), 85.
Written for Devotionals Daily by Dominic Done, author of When Faith Fails.
Is doubt a form of not knowing, not understanding?
Mark 9:17-24
Teacher, I brought You my son, possessed with a spirit which makes him mute; 18 and whenever it seizes him, it slams him to the ground and he foams at the mouth, and grinds his teeth and stiffens out. I told Your disciples to cast it out, and they could not do it." 19 And He answered them and said, "O unbelieving generation, how long shall I be with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring him to Me!" 20 They brought the boy to Him. When he saw Him, immediately the spirit threw him into a convulsion, and falling to the ground, he began rolling around and foaming at the mouth. 21 And He asked his father, "How long has this been happening to him?" And he said, "From childhood. 22 "It has often thrown him both into the fire and into the water to destroy him. But if You can do anything, take pity on us and help us!" 23 And Jesus said to him, " 'If You can?' All things are possible to him who believes." 24 Immediately the boy's father cried out and said, "I do believe; help my unbelief."
Did this man believe that Jesus could heal his son? I think he did, but he still wanted the healing to take place and the disciples were not able to heal him, giving the father at least some pause that his son might not be able to be healed.
I believe, help my unbelief!
Matt 17:20
for truly I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you.
Mark 4:35-40
"Let us go over to the other side." 36 Leaving the crowd, they took Him along with them in the boat, just as He was; and other boats were with Him. 37 And there arose a fierce gale of wind, and the waves were breaking over the boat so much that the boat was already filling up. 38 Jesus Himself was in the stern, asleep on the cushion; and they woke Him and said to Him, "Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?" 39 And He got up and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, "Hush, be still." And the wind died down and it became perfectly calm. 40 And He said to them, "Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?"
Luke 17:3-5
3 "Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. 4 "And if he sins against you seven times a day, and returns to you seven times, saying, 'I repent,' forgive him."
5 The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!"
Luke 22:31-34
31 "Simon, Simon, behold, Satan has demanded permission to sift you like wheat; 32 but I have prayed for you, that your faith may not fail; and you, when once you have turned again, strengthen your brothers." 33 But he said to Him, "Lord, with You I am ready to go both to prison and to death!" 34 And He said, "I say to you, Peter, the rooster will not crow today until you have denied three times that you know Me."
Are not even Peter’s denials of knowing Jesus a form of doubt.
We all struggle with doubt as the Lord leads us along our individual spiritual journey. He will never let us go, if we belong to Him, and will use every struggle, misunderstanding, incomplete knowledge of Himself and ourselves in Him to draw us into a closer more intimate walk with Him in this life toward maturity and eternal life with Him.
Try not to beat yourself up over any form of doubt. Do examine yourself and see if you are truly seeking relationship with God, to be the bride of Christ, to live empowered by His Spirit to fulfill all that He has called you to be and do while you yet live in this world. Trust God, for He loves you more than you will comprehend until you see Him face to face! Come quickly, Lord Jesus!
Pastor Dale