Notes of Faith October 29, 2022

Notes of Faith October 29, 2022

Article by Joe Rigney

Teacher, desiringGod.org

Tucked away in Psalm 16 is a shocking statement:

As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight. (Psalm 16:3)

“All my delight?” Could King David mean that? Could he really mean that all of his delight is in the people of God? He could. He says the saints are “the excellent ones.” This word is an important word, found throughout the Bible. Elsewhere it is translated as majestic.

O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! (Psalm 8:1)

So then, as the name of the Lord is majestic and excellent, so the people who bear that name are majestic and excellent.

Ordinary and Majestic

This word for majestic (or excellent) can also be translated as mighty or noble. It’s often linked to glory, power, and magnificence. Mountains, ocean waves, massive cedars, great cities — all of these are described in the Bible as majestic. When used of people, the word often refers to princes, rulers, and lords, those who have official positions of authority over others.

David Mathis explores the meaning of this biblical term as applied to God:

In our language, as in biblical terms, the word captures not only greatness but also goodness, both bigness and beauty, awesome power together with pleasant admiration.

God’s people have a kind of grandeur about them, one that calls forth awe and wonder from David. Such grandeur may not be visible physically, but, as C.S. Lewis reminds us, someday it will be. “It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship” (The Weight of Glory, 45).

When Dante encounters the apostles Peter and James in Paradise, he bows down before these “great and glorious princes.” After an encouragement from his guide Beatrice, he raises up his eyes “unto those mountains that had bowed them” (Paradiso, canto 25, lines 38–39). Dante, like David, is awed and delighted by the saints, who are as majestic as mountains.

Mankind and My Odd Neighbor

It’s important to note that David doesn’t delight in the saints merely as they will appear in glory; he delights in the saints “in the land.” In other words, these are real people, on earth, at the present time. How easy it is to love mankind in general, and yet how difficult to love particular individuals. As the old joke says, “I love humanity; it’s people I can’t stand.” The Christian variation of this is to love what Dietrich Bonhoeffer calls “the visionary ideal of community” (Life Together, 27). But this idealized abstraction is merely a wish-dream, and the moment it comes into contact with concrete people, it vanishes like a mist.

Lewis identifies the demonic strategy in such a temptation. Screwtape encourages his young protégé to exploit the gap between glorious expressions like “the body of Christ” and the actual faces in the next pew.

Provided that any of those neighbours sing out of tune, or have boots that squeak, or double chins, or odd clothes, the patient will quite easily believe that their religion must therefore be somehow ridiculous. . . . Work hard, then, on the disappointment or anticlimax which is certainly coming to the patient during his first few weeks as a churchman. (The Screwtape Letters, 6–7)

“How easy it is to love mankind in general, and yet how difficult to love particular individuals.”

David’s celebration in Psalm 16 avoids precisely this disappointment. David is not confessing his delight in an abstraction, in a wish-dream community. The majestic ones that have captured his delight are the saints in the land, near at hand, singing out of tune with their double chins and odd clothes. David looks upon them and says, “Majestic. Excellent. All my delight.”

Captured by God for God

How is David able to do this? How can he see majesty in such mundane simplicity? Because David knows that these are saints. That is, they are not merely the excellent ones; they are the holy ones. What draws David’s delight is that God’s people are set apart for his purposes.

These people reflect, however imperfectly, the majesty and glory and beauty of God’s own holiness. Henry Scougal once said, “The worth and excellency of a soul is to be measured by the object of its love.” And so, David looks upon those who love God, he sees their worth and excellence, the majesty of their souls, and he says, “These are my people, and I love them.”

Jonathan Edwards said much the same thing. When we love something, we love when others love that same thing. That’s why fans of the same sports team immediately hit it off. The mutual joy forms the foundation of a new friendship. How much more when the object of our mutual admiration is God himself?

What heightens and advances the pleasure of society is the excellency and the love of those with whom we converse. But the saints are the excellent of the earth; they are possessed of excellency of the highest kind, and they only are endowed with true excellency. Proverbs 12:6, “The righteous is more excellent than his neighbor”; and 17:27, “A man of understanding is of an excellent spirit.” And certainly in such conversation is the greatest delight to be found. Psalm 16:2–3, “My goodness extendeth not to thee; but to the saints that are in the earth, and to the excellent, in whom is all my delight.”

And as religion makes lovely, so it begets love, the purest and most ardent. Nothing so much tends to charity, peace, mutual benevolence and bounty as Christianity, and therefore nothing so much sweetens human society. (Works of Jonathan Edwards, 109).

Do We See Nobility?

David’s celebration, then, becomes an exhortation to us. It forces us to ask questions of ourselves and to seek God’s help in being conformed to the image of Christ. Do we see nobility in the simplest of saints? Do we delight in the saints in our land, particularly in our local church? Do we delight in actual people — quirks, warts, and all? Do we delight in them for their holiness and majesty, and do we delight in them in hopes of spurring them on to greater holiness and majesty?

If not, then perhaps we should turn Psalm 16 into a prayer.

Lord, we say to you, “You are our Lord; we have no good apart from you.” Help us to find your goodness in your people. Make us to know your holiness reflected in your saints. Lead us to see the worth, excellency, and majesty of each and every Christian that we meet, from the great to the small, from the strong to the weak. And then fill us with the joy of Jesus himself, who takes pleasure in you and in his people with all his delight.

I love the saints! I have not always, but thought of their perfect sinless state and looked forward to what they would be…me too! Then the Lord taught me through the Scriptures that I should love them now with all of their issues and imperfections. It is a process. But I am learning to love as He loves. Please join me in loving that which God loves and is placing us together in His family.

Love God! Love others!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 28, 2022

Notes of Faith October 28, 2022

Holy Ground

I am your Father-God. Listen to Me! Learn what it means to be a child of the everlasting King. Your richest duty is devotion to Me. This duty is such a joyous privilege that it feels like a luxury. You tend to feel guilty about pushing back the boundaries of your life to make space for time alone with Me. The world is waiting to squeeze you into its mold and to crowd out time devoted to Me. The ways of the world have also warped your conscience, which punishes you for doing the very thing that pleases Me most: seeking My Face.

Listen to Me above the clamor of voices trying to distract you.

Ask My Spirit to control your mind, for He and I work in perfect harmony. Be still and attentive in My Presence.

You are on holy ground.

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on His shoulders. And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. —Isaiah 9:6

“Rejoice greatly, O daughter of Zion! Shout, O daughter of Jerusalem! Behold, your King is coming to you; He is just and having salvation, lowly and riding on a donkey, a colt, the foal of a donkey.”

— Zechariah 9:9 NKJV

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by Him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. — Romans 8:15–16

“Do not come any closer,” God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” — Exodus 3:5

“Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.”

— Exodus 3:5

Learn to listen to Me even while you are listening to other people. As they open their souls to your scrutiny, you are on holy ground. You need the help of My Spirit to respond appropriately. Ask Him to think through you, live through you, love through you. My own Being is alive within you in the Person of the Holy Spirit. If you respond to others’ needs through your unaided thought processes, you offer them dry crumbs. When the Spirit empowers your listening and speaking, My streams of living water flow through you to other people. Be a channel of My Love, Joy, and Peace by listening to Me as you listen to others.

“Do not come any closer,” God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” — Exodus 3:5

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own. — 1 Corinthians 6:19

“Whoever believes in Me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him.” By this He meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in Him were later to receive. Up to that time the Spirit had not been given, since Jesus had not yet been glorified. —John 7:38–39

Excerpted from Jesus Listens Note-Taking Edition by Sarah Young, copyright Sarah Young.

God blesses those that believe in Jesus and His work in providing salvation and eternal life with His Spirit to live within them. The problem or issue that continues is that we do not yield to the leading and prompting of the Spirit. All power and authority resides within us through the Holy Spirit. We MUST learn to listen and obey the gift of God . . . Himself . . . to help us in our daily walk in every situation.

Give Him glory and yield to His divine plan for your life and be used by Him in the lives of others! Love God! Love others!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 27, 2022

Notes of Faith October 27, 2022

Wild About You: Wounds

About HER first

Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. — Psalm 25:16

To do any sort of justice to a book for women would require me (John) to go deeper, listen even more carefully, study, delve into the mystery (okay, mess) of a woman’s soul. Part of me didn’t want to go there. Pull back. Withdraw. I was keenly aware of this going on inside me, and I felt like a jerk. But I also knew enough about myself and about the battle for a woman’s heart that I needed to explore this ambivalence.

What is this thing in me — and in most men — that doesn’t want to go deep into a woman’s world?

“You are too much. It’s too much work. Men are simpler. Easier.” And isn’t that the message you’ve lived with all your life as a woman? “You’re too much, and not enough. You’re just not worth the effort.” Now, part of a man’s fundamental reluctance to truly dive into the world of a woman comes from a man’s deepest fear: failure. He fears that having delved into his woman’s world, he won’t have what it takes to help her there. That is his sin. That is his cowardice. And because of her shame, most of the time a man gets away with it.

Most marriages reach this sort of unspoken settlement. “I’m not coming any closer. This is as far as I’m willing to go. But I won’t leave, and that ought to make you happy.” And so there is this sort of détente, a cordial agreement to live only so close. The effect is that most women feel alone.

Lord Jesus, you know the ways in which I feel alone. Give my husband courage to come near, even as I draw near to you.

Now About HIM

For I am poor and needy, and my heart is wounded within me. — Psalm 109:22

For most of us, our wounds are an immense source of shame.

A man’s not supposed to get hurt; he’s certainly not supposed to let it really matter. And so most men minimize their wounds. King David (a guy who was hardly a pushover) didn’t act like that at all. “I am poor and needy,” he confessed openly, “and my heart is wounded within me” (Psalm 109:22). Or perhaps men will admit it happened, but deny it was a wound because they deserved it.

After many months of counseling, I asked Dave a simple question: “What would it take to convince you that you are a man?” “Nothing,” he said. “Nothing can convince me.” We sat in silence as tears ran down my cheeks. He had embraced the wound and owned its message as final. There was no sign of emotion at all. I went home and wept — for Dave, and for so many other men I know, and for myself because I realized that I, too, had embraced my wound.

The only thing more tragic than the tragedy that happens to us is the way we handle it.

God is fiercely committed to you, to the restoration and release of your masculine heart. But a wound that goes unacknowledged and unwept is a wound that cannot heal. A wound you’ve embraced is a wound that cannot heal. A wound you think you deserved is a wound that cannot heal.

God, give me the courage to acknowledge my wound so that I might heal. I trust you to restore me and release my masculine heart.

Excerpted from Wild About You by John & Stasi Eldredge, copyright John Eldredge and Stasi Eldredge.

Wow! I never realized how much I hold myself at a distance, or don’t delve into the woman that is my wife. I feel so close, in love, partnered for life and yet what do I really know about her experience as a woman? I pray that any wounds that I have suffered have not made my God-made masculine heart weak and afraid to embrace and draw near to the gift God gave me in my wife. I pray this for all of you, men and women to think why we process things the way we do. Maybe there are some wounds that need to be addressed to bring healing and real intimacy between one another and God. Love God! Love others!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 26, 2022

Notes of Faith October 26, 2022

The Warrior King

Longing for the Warrior King

The salvation Jesus brings is multifaceted.

Jesus saves us from the spiritual powers of sin, Satan, and eternal death through His crucifixion. He saves us from the deterioration of our bodies and minds through His resurrection, giving us healing in this life and raising us with a body like His in the life to come. And Jesus saves His people from persecution. Like healing, sometimes He brings this about in this life, and sometimes He calls His own to follow Him all the way to death. But His final rescue is sure, and His people can cry out, “Lord Jesus, save me!” because

Christ, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for Him. — Hebrews 9:28

While we can see this holistic salvation now, at the time of Jesus’ first appearing, those languishing under Roman oppression were not so sure. John the Baptist, who prepared the way for Jesus’ public ministry, sent messengers from prison to ask,

Are you the One who is to come, or shall we look for another? — Luke 7:19

John had pronounced in Jesus the coming of “the salvation of God” that would include wrath, fire, and an axe laid to the root (Luke 3:4–9). Now John was in prison, decidedly unrescued, and wondered whether he had identified the wrong one as Messiah. From James and John requesting to sit on thrones flanking Jesus “in your glory” (Mark 10:37) to Peter rebuking Jesus’ insinuation of crucifixion and slashing his sword at the soldiers arresting his Master, this question of Jesus’ relationship to the Roman and Jewish power structures of His day sits tensely in the backdrop of all the gospel narratives.

We anticipate Jesus’ second coming in a similar way to how John the Baptist and others anticipated his first. He will return not as the sacrificial lamb or the suffering servant but as the Warrior King. We share their ancient hope of rescue: His real promise to deal with the real aggressors who harm us. While we will focus on the immediate context of persecution for the faith, I believe the imagery of deliverance could help you who have suffered abuse, discrimination, or harassment. These are tragically prevalent in our day, and if they are part of your story, I pray you will find hope in beholding this aspect of Jesus.

Christ, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time, not to deal with sin but to save those who are eagerly waiting for Him.

— Hebrews 9:28

The Thlipsis of the Thessalonians

The apostle Paul ministered under constant persecution, receiving the same dogged aggression from Jewish religious leaders that he once carried out against Jesus’ followers. This was not hidden in the fine print of his conversion. Days after Paul’s blinding Damascus road encounter, Jesus sent word to him by a messenger:

I will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of My name. — Acts 9:16

Paul spoke openly of this expectation of persecution for Jesus’ sake wherever he shared the gospel. One of the places where new converts faced fierce, immediate opposition was in Thessalonica. Indeed, because of public outcry Paul was able to proclaim the news about Jesus for only three weeks before he was forced out of the city (Acts 17:1–9). Not long after, he wrote to the brand-new church about the persecution they continued to face.

In both of his letters, Paul speaks often about their “afflictions” (thlipsis in the Greek) because of their allegiance to Christ. When they first believed, the Thessalonians “received the word in much affliction” (1 Thessalonians 1:6). After his expulsion from the city, Paul sent Timothy back to exhort the new, persecuted believers “that no one be moved by these afflictions” (1 Thessalonians 3:3). He rejoiced upon learning from Timothy that “you are standing fast in the Lord”

(1 Thessalonians 3:8).

Whatever time passed between Paul’s first and second letters to the Thessalonians, the afflictions did not abate. The young church had persevered so admirably that Paul wrote,

We ourselves boast about you in the churches of God for your steadfastness and faith in all your persecutions and in the afflictions that you are enduring.

— 2 Thess. 1:4

Apparently, the church misunderstood Paul’s teaching on Jesus’ return — a confusion complicated by a letter, falsely attributed to Paul, teaching that “the day of the Lord has come” (2:2). So Paul merges the issues of their afflictions and the day of the Lord to explain exactly what will happen when their Savior appears. He holds out to them the hope of rescue.

The Warrior King

We do not know the precise nature of the Thessalonians’ persecution. Acts 17:5 records an attack on the house of Jason during Paul’s ministry in Thessalonica that sounds similar to what our sister in India endured — physical beating and the destruction of property by an angry mob. Their experience of thlipsis likely also included social and economic ostracization and an unwillingness of the government to protect them from acts of aggression.

The larger story of these afflictions is the story of powerlessness. Abuse survivors have tasted it. Victims of workplace discrimination know it. Anyone who has been on the wrong end of the misuse of power has felt helplessness to stop what is being done or to find justice when the aggressor is protected. Having no voice, no recourse, no traction with your account of what happened is one of the most horrific and dehumanizing experiences in this fallen world.

With that taste of powerlessness in your mouth, consider the hope you would feel when you beheld this vision of Jesus:

God considers it just to repay with affliction those who afflict you, and to grant relief to you who are afflicted as well as to us, when the Lord Jesus is revealed from Heaven with His mighty angels in flaming fire, inflicting vengeance on those who do not know God and on those who do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. — 2 Thessalonians 1:6–8

Let’s use our sanctified imagination to develop this portrait of Jesus’ appearing as Warrior King. I’m going to suggest a thought experiment that will be immediately applicable for some and something to file away for others. If you are facing affliction, my guess is that the person or group that is making you miserable looms large over your life, haunting your thoughts. I wish there were a way to erase their image from the canvas of your mind. I’m not sure there is. But there is a way to paint something around that image that will put the terrible afflictions you face now into a larger context.

Paul says that Jesus will come “with His mighty angels.” This is not the first reference connecting Jesus with an army of angels. On the night of his betrayal, Jesus commanded Peter to put his sword away because, had Jesus needed military backup, He could call on His Father and “He will at once send me more than twelve legions of angels” (Matthew 26:53). A Roman legion consisted of six thousand soldiers. Whether Jesus meant exactly 72,000 angels or simply an innumerable host, the point is that they serve to fight at His command. Of course, He doesn’t need them, being God the Son, almighty and eternal. But the optics give a stunning visual for those overwhelmed by persecution.

So on the canvas of your mind, where you see the menacing face of the one antagonizing you, imagine behind them the risen Christ. Surrounding Him are thousands of angels. If you’re trying to mentally populate the space, imagine a line of thirty-six angel warriors on either side of Jesus, backfilled a thousand warriors deep, as far as your eye can see.

But don’t forget the fire. Jesus is portrayed “in flaming fire,” a common theme in most visions of the risen Jesus and a symbol of judgment and purification throughout the Bible. So, however you were envisioning Jesus before on your mental canvas, this one is not cuddling a lamb or smiling serenely toward Heaven. This Jesus is on the move, forward marching, sword in hand, blazing with the fiery judgment of God, coming to bring relief to you and to inflict vengeance on those who torment you.

Help is on the way.

Excerpted from Bright Hope for Tomorrow by Chris David, copyright Chris Davis.

If we are here a little longer, more persecution is coming for those who follow and proclaim Jesus as Lord and Savior. It will be worse than any living at that time have ever experienced. God gives His own grace to endure. Stephen asking God to forgive those who were stoning him to death. We may or may not experience such persecution, but it is becoming more deadly. Our way of providing for our families may be hindered or stopped by persecuting forces. Our homes could be taken away. We may suffer greatly for the name of Jesus . . . but in the end we will be glorified for glorifying Jesus while we wait for His return. Even so, come quickly, Lord Jesus! Endure your short time of persecution waiting expectantly for the glory of the Lord to appear!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 25, 2022

Notes of Faith October 25, 2022

Most of us know Anne Wilson from her powerful worship music. Songs like “My Jesus” and “Something About That Name” have led us to raise our hands and praise Jesus together no matter what we are going through. In her new book “My Jesus”, Anne shares her journey through suffering and tragedy after the loss of her brother and how their family chose to worship Jesus in the midst of their grief. Enjoy this excerpt.

I stood from my seat on the front pew and began to walk to the piano onstage. I took one slow step after another up the red-carpeted stairs, a shaky nervousness filling my body. It was the same sensation I’d felt for days, only magnified. I reached the piano and turned to look out across the sea of faces in the crowd. Friends and family members looked back at me with tears in their eyes. Had I not been feeling such a dark sense of loss, I would have been thrilled to see so many loved ones gathered in such a majestic place. It was beautiful, but I couldn’t appreciate the beauty of it. I was overwhelmed by both the ache of goodbye and seeing hundreds of people staring at me. A few friends gave me encouraging nods as I took a seat. It was time to worship my Jesus.

I took a deep breath and smoothed my dress to calm my shaking hands. I was about to sing for the first time in front of twelve hundred people. Would I even be able to make it through? Would my hands stop shaking enough to let me play?

As I gently placed my fingers on the keys, I looked up to God for a brief second, imploring Him for help. At that very moment, God removed every nervous feeling from my body. The fear and worry were gone. I looked at my fingers and saw steadiness — the shaking was gone. Thank You, God! With a heart suddenly at peace, I took in a deep breath and prepared to sing.

As Carson, Hayes, and I began to play the intro to the song, I heard God’s voice again. His words, interjected at such a pivotal moment, would change my life completely:

This is what I’m calling you to do. I’m calling you to praise and worship My name.

I had no doubt the voice was the Lord’s. I will never forget those words.

Hope is found in Jesus’ beautiful name.

With a confidence that could only come from God’s Spirit, I began to play and sing “What a Beautiful Name,” a song that magnifies the powerful, wonderful name of Jesus. The song speaks of His longing for us to join Him in heaven and tells of His victory over death and the grave. The song was a cool drink of water to my parched soul, and I prayed it was the same for everyone who heard it that day.

That day, I sang for Jacob, and I sang to worship my Jesus. Without tears, without stopping, and without breaking down, I offered my song for them both. The ability to sing such powerful words at such a sorrowful time without breaking down was only possible through God’s strength and His Spirit. Now, more than ever, my family and I wanted to praise the name of Jesus. We all realized in a terrible and wonderful way how short life really is and how it can change in an instant. We longed to tell the world of the hope found in Jesus’ beautiful name. I knew that was what Jacob would want too.

I lifted my fingers from the keys as the final notes of my song rang throughout the sanctuary. I exhaled a deep sigh of relief. The faces I had just feared were smiling at me through tears. Many held tissues to their eyes.

As I returned to my seat, God impressed another thing on my heart: I would never be an astronaut. I have called you to a life of worship through music, He said. I could never have imagined that God would speak to me about my future at such a moment, and even less that He would call me to a life of music. But somehow, I just believed Him. In that moment, I had no doubt the Lord would fulfill this calling on my life. I knew that meant I wasn’t going to be an astronaut, and I was okay with that knowledge. In the aftermath of losing Jacob, the dream of being an astronaut didn’t seem important anymore. With Jacob in heaven and a huge hole in my heart, I barely had a will to live, much less to pursue the dream of going to space. I did not feel even an ounce of grief at the thought of leaving that childhood dream behind. I actually felt peace. The desire to go to space was simply gone.

Losing Jacob changed everything, including my dreams for my life. I now knew I would have a future in music, worshiping and praising the name of Jesus. God must have given me a gift of faith to accept such a sudden change in direction and believe that He would fulfill that calling. I had no idea how or when His new plan for me would happen or what that calling would entail.

I just knew it would be. Someday. Because God said so, and I believed Him.

Excerpted from My Jesus by Anne Wilson, copyright Anne Wilson.

Having lived almost a complete biblical lifetime, I have come to realize that for many if not most, God has given us gifts, talent and abilities to accomplish tasks on earth that provide for our needs, and oftentimes the specifics, like a job or career, change. But in all of them we are able and called to serve and worship God. It should not be too hard to believe someone who planned on being an astronaut gave their life to writing worship music. I am one who planned to be a teacher of music, and have done so, then God put me in computer processing of tax return, starting a business in taxes and accounting, another several year management position followed, before He called me to pastor His church, a place I never dreamed I would be. Through all of these opportunities to provide for myself and family, leading a life of a disciple of Jesus has made an impact on those around me. We need to listen to the Lord for His blessing and opportunity through His gifting and plan for our life and then bless others through whatever He is calling us to do! Love God! Love others!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 24, 2022

Notes of Faith October 24, 2022

Good Boundaries

What if, when trying to apply your boundaries in an emotionally charged moment, you lose your resolve, because the other person makes statements that confuse you, make you question the validity of this boundary, or accuse you in ways that hurt? You need to be prepared to know what to do.

See if you’ve heard any of these types of statements from others. Assess whether these statements have contributed to you giving up on setting boundaries with certain people.

When they say:

“What I did isn’t that big of a deal. You’re being so dramatic.” “You are being overly sensitive.”

“And you call yourself a Christian?! Jesus wouldn’t treat people this way.”

“I thought Christians were supposed to be forgiving.” “You’ve got such a hard heart. Jesus would have never walked away.”

“This is just more evidence of you being controlling and unforgiving.”

“Jesus loved all people and gave grace no matter what. So, what’s your problem?”

“You don’t seem like yourself. You’ve changed.”

“I’m so disappointed in you.”

“You’re just crazy and this is irrational.”

“You’re so selfish. All you care about is yourself.” “Seriously?! How can you be so mean after all I’ve done for you?”

“You’re so off base. Drawing boundaries isn’t biblical.” “But you’re my (wife, daughter, best friend, mother, sister). Acting this way toward me is out of order and unacceptable.”

Here’s why these statements are so triggering:

They are offensive. They aren’t an accurate picture of what’s true about who we are. Being misunderstood is so brutal because someone else is taking liberties with our identity.

They are threatening. When someone makes hurtful accusations and pushes against our boundaries, it can feel as if whatever this relationship is providing for us will be taken away and some need in us will go unmet.

They are disillusioning. When someone else makes us question our need for the boundary, we can second-guess reality, our sanity, our rationality, and even the severity of what’s really going on. We can easily start to wonder if the real problem is us rather than considering the source and why we are in this hard dynamic in the first place.

It is so very important that we are aware of all three of these feelings that can make us vulnerable to not establishing wise boundaries. Here’s the first thing we need to notice about the effects of these triggering statements: they are each evidence that we need to establish a boundary with this person.

If we are living honest lives that honor God, we must not forget that people not liking our boundary does not mean we aren’t living right before God.

— Lysa TerKeurst

And here’s the second thing to notice: if we are afraid that this person will think poorly of us, potentially abandon us, or try to make us feel crazy for taking a step toward making the relationship healthy, chances are even higher that, without wise boundaries, they will eventually do all three of these things to us. (Dear me: read that last sentence one more time... maybe ten more times.)

Unhealthy people typically don’t manage their emotions and expectations (self-regulate) very well and can easily get offended when their lack of responsibility doesn’t become your emergency.

Their thought process is often that their need trumps your limitations. And the telltale sign of their unhealthiness is their unwillingness to accept no as an answer without trying to make you feel terrible, punished, or unsure about the necessity of the boundary.

If we want to stay healthy, we have to use our limited energy in the right way. We could waste years putting all our efforts into trying to change the other person’s mind or prove to them why we need the boundary, or worst of all, we could drop the boundary altogether and continue living in dysfunction.

Let me state something crucial. I don’t want us to suddenly start categorizing everyone around us as healthy or not healthy. But we must pay attention to those who accept our healthy boundaries and those who resist them.

The apostle Paul addresses some key components to love:

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ.

What I like about Philippians 1:9–10 is that the love here is associated with knowledge and discernment. So, the inverse is also true. A lack of wisdom and discernment is actually unloving. Sometimes we only associate love as a feeling. But we have to remember that biblical love is an intentional action where we want what’s best for us and the other person. Keeping this in mind, when setting boundaries our heart posture should be one of wisdom and discernment for the sake of true and healthy love.

Healthy people who desire healthy relationships don’t have an issue with other people’s healthy boundaries.

Hebrews 5:14 reminds us that mature people “have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.” That word distinguish means someone can discern more readily what is the right way to treat someone and what is not acceptable. What someone should say and what someone probably shouldn’t say. And just because a person can do something, doesn’t mean she should do that thing. Discerning and choosing one’s actions carefully leads to a wisdom that those around them can trust.

Healthy people are mature people.

They seek to understand your concerns,

discuss any issues that the need for the boundary reveals, and

respect your limits.

Remember, healthy people who desire healthy relationships know how to be responsible with the access you give them. For example, if they borrow your car, chances are they won’t return it on empty. But if they do, you can let them know that if they want to borrow it again, they just need to replace the gas they use. And they should see that as a reasonable request without making you feel anything less than generous.

Even if someone doesn’t like a boundary you have set, healthy people know the difference between hurt and harm. A friend who constantly runs late may feel hurt that you are no longer willing to ride with her to events but can recognize your boundary wasn’t put in place to cause her any harm. She won’t think that you’re selfish and rude. Nor will she blame her issues on you. And she certainly won’t diminish your identity, disrupt your safety, or disregard your assessment of reality. She’ll either adjust her untimeliness and ride with you or just meet you at the event. Either way, she will respect you enough to respect your boundaries.

Healthy people understand your limits because they are in touch with their own limitations. They communicate what they can and cannot do — what they are and are not willing to tolerate. And they expect you to do the same.

Understanding this can help us realize sometimes the problem isn’t that we aren’t good at setting healthy boundaries. Maybe we aren’t good at recognizing that we won’t get healthy results from unhealthy relationships.

Somewhere in all the looking around at others for validation, we’ve stopped looking up.

If we are living honest lives that honor God, we must not forget that people not liking our boundary does not mean we aren’t living right before God.

When someone says something that hurts or offends us when we draw a boundary, it can be good to check ourselves. Is any part of this an attempt on our part to do harm, control, retaliate, check out, or give ourselves permission to be irresponsible? While checking ourselves is healthy, questioning our identity is not.

Checking ourselves means looking at a current attitude or behavior to see if it is in line with God’s instructions and wisdom. Questioning our identity is doubting who we are because we have given too much power to other people by letting their opinions define us.

I don’t know any other way to say this except to be absolutely direct: If our identity, the foundational belief we hold of who we are, is tied to an opinion someone has of us, we need to reassess. We must be honest with how much access to our heart we’ve given to this person. It’s not bad to give someone access to our heart but when we give an unhealthy person too much access, it can shake us to our core. When their opinion of us starts to affect how we see ourselves, we can lose sight of the best parts of who we are because we get entangled in the exhausting pursuit of trying to keep that relationship intact no matter the cost. And when this is the cycle we are caught in, sometimes we would rather manage people’s perceptions of us than care for ourselves and the relationship by putting appropriate boundaries in place.

When we give people personal access to us, those people must be responsible with it. And emotional access to our hearts is especially important.

Excerpted from Good Boundaries and Goodbyes by Lysa TerKeurst, copyright Lysa TerKeurst.

We have relationships that are just acquaintances, others that we consider close, and others that are closer still. Jesus had a group of thousands that followed Him, but within that He had 12 close friends, and within that 3 that were closer still. There are boundaries that are good! Learn to use them for the glory of God.

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 23, 2022

Notes of Faith October 23, 2022

When God Doesn't Do What You Want

James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to Him. “Teacher,” they said, “we want You to do for us whatever we ask.” — Mark 10:35

The disciples were on their way to Jerusalem. Struggling to understand all Jesus was telling them about what awaited Him, James and John made one of the Bible’s boldest statements to Jesus. It is also one of the worst!

Jesus had just told them that He must go to Jerusalem to be handed over and condemned to death. This was not the first time they had heard Jesus talk like this. The good news, He told them, was that He would rise again. Like many of the Jews at the time, James and John thought they were coming into their glory. God was going to throw off their enemies. Restore Israel. Bring peace. And they were going to be, or at least wanted to be, right at the center of it all.

Barely missing a beat, James and John’s first response to what Jesus had just told them was, “We want you to do for us whatever we ask” (Mark 10:35). A pretty bold request!

Of course, they wanted Jesus to exalt them to a position of power or status. They wanted to rule with Jesus. And yet Jesus reminded them that they must first suffer for Him.

God was not going to do what they wanted.

"When God doesn’t do what we want, He is doing something better."

— Ruth Schwenk

It’s easy to poke holes in James and John’s request and miss the more discreet ways we try to sell our own agendas to God. We too come to Jesus with our big plans, expectations, and self-centered dreams. When God doesn’t do what we want, we are tempted to get angry, lose faith, or take matters into our own hands.

The Bible says,

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the lord’s purpose that prevails. — Proverbs 19:21

Today, posture your heart to do what God wants. Walk humbly. Remember that He is the One leading you.

When God doesn’t do what we want, He is doing something better.

Lord, You are the King of creation. Reign in my life. Humble me. Posture my heart to do what You want. Forgive me for the times I make conditions or demands. You are the center, and I am not. I want to follow You, knowing that where and how You lead me is better and wiser. In Jesus’ name, amen.

~ Ruth

Excerpted from Settle My Soul by Karen Ehman and Ruth Schwenk, copyright Karen Ehman and Ruth Schwenk

God speaks to lead us as He wants us to go . . . if we would only listen. He speaks through the truth and perfection of the Scriptures. He speaks through godly men and women in our lives. He speaks through prayer, a communication that for all too many is one way, just toward God, not from God. God blesses the heart and life that is willing to do His will. He gave you gifts and talents and certainly wants you to use them for His glory and your good. Love the Lord your God with all you heart, soul, mind, and strength and your neighbor as yourself and you will fulfill all the law of God!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 22, 2022

Notes of Faith October 22, 2022

Come to Me

Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.

— Matthew 11:28–30

Sometimes we need to set things down simply because they are heavy. But how often do we expect ourselves to keep holding on to heavy things out of guilt or spite or a need to prove ourselves? Maybe the heavy thing is a self-critical thought or a hurtful relationship or an insistence on doing something perfectly. These types of heavy things hurt us when we carry them for too long, and they are worth putting down. Just like setting down a really heavy box, there can be a lot of relief in letting go of something that is causing us harm because it is too heavy.

Jesus Himself encourages us to put down our heavy burdens, and promises to exchange them for something lighter.

When you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, it could be helpful to pause and ask yourself — could I give up some of this heavy burden? Is it possible that Jesus has something lighter for me to carry, something easier? How could I rest in this moment?

Practice Following the breathing space guide. Pay particular attention to any parts of your body that are holding tension. Notice if that tension is useful. If not, consider letting it go. When you are finished, jot down some observations in your journal.

Breathing Space

This practice is similar to a regular sitting practice, but it is meant to be more portable — an opportunity to quickly “drop in” at any point during the day to check in with how you are doing. The practice is often divided into three one-minute sections that have an hourglass shape of awareness (see below). However, there is no need to time each minute separately; just set your timer for three minutes if you choose, and then estimate one minute for each of the three sections.

1. Pause wherever you are and become still. If you’re able, close your eyes if you choose, or close them halfway with a soft gaze. Take a couple deep breaths, then allow your breathing to return to its normal rate. Recognize that you are in God’s presence.

2. First minute: Starting with a broad awareness, check in with what is going on for you in the moment. This “wide awareness” is the top part of the hourglass shape in this meditation. You might notice things in these different areas:

Physical sensations, including your breath moving in and out

Thoughts going through your mind

Emotions, either prominent or under the surface

Behaviors or urges you are having

3. Second minute: Narrowing your attention to breathing (as the middle part of the hourglass shape), notice where you feel your breath most vividly (ex. your upper lip, shoulders moving, chest expanding/contracting, belly moving up and down). Rest your attention there, paying close attention to the sensations of your breath coming in and out of your body, given by God. If focusing on breath is triggering for you, choose a different anchor for your attention that allows you to regulate your emotions more effectively.

4. Third minute: Broadening your attention once again (as the bottom “wide awareness” part of the hourglass shape), imagine that your whole body is breathing. Imagine the air moving all the way from your head down to your toes, and then back out through your body again. Allow your whole body to experience the breath of life, given by God, restoring your body and soul, one moment at a time.

5. When you are done, open up your attention to the space around you. Notice if there are any adjustments needed in your circumstances or self-care in response to what you noticed during the practice. Thank God for this moment of life and continue on to your next activity!

Jesus Himself encourages us to put down our heavy burdens, and promises to exchange them for something lighter.

Carry Each Other's Burdens

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

— Galatians 6:2

If someone has a heavy box, we might be able to literally carry that burden for a while until our arms get too tired. But what if their burden is depression, a terminal illness, or getting ghosted? There’s not much we can do to change the difficult circumstances of other people, and it can be hard to know how to help.

There are times when our burden-carrying can be practical, like writing a card or helping with a difficult task, but praying for one another is one of the most important ways we can help. This doesn’t have to be super formal. Whenever someone comes to mind in the midst of a day, you can imagine them in God’s presence and ask God to be with them. As the Quakers say, you can “hold them up in the light” of Christ and then trust that God will do the rest. God loves that person even more than you and is providing everything they need.

You never need to fix things for other people, nor can you. But you can always hold them up in God’s light as they are brought to your mind. God will do the rest.

Practice Following the lovingkindness/blessing guide, focus your attention on someone you know who is having a difficult time. As you extend compassionate blessing to them, recognize that your prayer is one way of carrying their burdens. God will do the rest.

Lovingkindness/Blessing Practice

Being kind toward ourselves and others can take some practice, and this meditation is a chance to practice that kind of compassion in our thoughts. It can be used as a prayer or blessing — lifting ourselves and others before God as we hope for good things.

1. Identify one or more people to whom you will practice extending lovingkindness, choosing from the following categories:

Yourself

Someone you love, care about, or admire, who brings you warm feelings when you think about them

Someone you do not know well, a stranger or distant acquaintance

Someone who is difficult for you, who you do not get along with well or who has caused you some pain

All people, animals, and plants in the world, all living beings everywhere

2. Sit at the edge of a chair with your feet on the floor (or cross-legged on a meditation cushion) with a straight spine and hands on your thighs or lap. Alternately, you may choose to lie on your back on a firm surface with feet apart, toes falling away from one another, and arms at your sides.

3. Get comfortable. Close your eyes if you choose, or close them halfway with a soft gaze.

4. Take a couple deep breaths, then allow your breathing to return to its normal rate. Notice the sensations of your breath coming in and out.

5. One at a time, bring to mind an image of yourself or the person(s) to whom you are extending compassion. If you would like, you can imagine them resting in God’s loving hands. Recognize that like everyone, you and/or the other person in your mind is in need of compassion.

6. With each image in mind, choose one of these two sets of phrases (or a different set of compassionate phrases that is more comfortable for you) and repeat them several times toward each of the people you have chosen to extend compassion to during your practice. As you repeat the phrases, recognize that all people desire these good things, and all people are loved by God.

7. When you are done, rest for a moment in the compassionate kindness you have practiced. Then take a deep breath and open up your attention to the space around you. Thank God for His lovingkindness toward us all and continue on to your next activity.

Excerpted from A Mindful Moment by Dr. Irene Kraegel, copyright Zondervan

Too many of us do not take time to rest, to recover, to be prepared and ready for the intense lives that we live. We need to live orderly and godly in order to do what we know to be true and live lives of obedience. Love God! Love others!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 21, 2022

Notes of Faith October 21, 2022

Grateful That God Makes a Way

Look, I am about to do something new; even now it is coming. Do you not see it? Indeed, I will make a way in the wilderness, rivers in the desert. — Isaiah 43:19

In the classic Broadway musical and film The Sound of Music, the Reverend Mother sends Maria away from the convent to work as a nanny for the Von Trapp family. Maria is unsettled at the idea of leaving the abbey and giving up on her dream of becoming a nun. The Reverend Mother reassures her with the now-famous cliché, “When the Lord closes a door, somewhere He opens a window.” In other words, whenever one opportunity ends, another opportunity will come along — and it will probably be a better one. Sure enough, the closing abbey door leads to the opening of the window that ushers Fräulein Maria into the arms of the dashing Captain Von Trapp.

Though the cliché is meant to help people stay positive in the face of disappointment, it isn’t exactly true. God doesn’t promise that when something doesn’t work out, something better is waiting for us just around the corner. His pledge is far more substantive than that. He promises to sustain us amid life’s disappointments. When all the doors and windows remain shut, He helps us make our way through the dark room, and He sustains us. Our circumstances do not always change for the better. But we can be confident that He will use them to change us for the better.

‘I know the plans I have for you’ — this is the Lord’s declaration — ‘plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope’. — Jeremiah 29:11

When was the last time you faced a closed door? During this time, how did God make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert? Why can you trust Him with closed doors, even when there are no windows in sight?

GROW GRATEFUL

Thank God that He makes a way through the wilderness.

Grateful That God Is for Me

The Lord is for me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me? — Psalm 118:6

When our family plays board games, everyone is out to win. It’s a no-holds-barred, every-man-for-himself, dog-eat-dog rivalry. Through our sons’ teen years, we often played Settlers of Catan. The battles were epic. Still, they were all in good fun. Mostly. But things took a turn for the worse when we expanded the game with cards that could be used as a method of attacking other players. This (and the ambiguous rules) started to create problems. Competitions turned into arguments and hard feelings. Some players felt that others really were “against them.” Things got so bad that we had to call it quits and find some board games that were less combative.

It’s one thing to have an opponent in a game — but having a real- life opponent is an entirely different matter. Especially when that opponent is out to do you harm. Some people think God is out to do them harm. Perhaps they’ve lost a job or encountered a series of unfortunate events. They look at the hand they’ve been dealt and conclude that God is not on their side. But according to the Bible, this is not true. The Lord is for you and not against you. He may not always answer your prayers in the way you expect. Nevertheless, He delights in your well-being (Psalm 35:27) and rejoices in doing you good (Jeremiah 32:41). Whenever life gets rough or people try to do you harm, don’t despair or be afraid. Remember that God is always on your side.

How do you feel knowing that God is for you and not against you? Why do people sometimes struggle to believe that God is for them? What difference does it make to have God on your side when people come against you?

GROW GRATEFUL

Thank God that He is for you.

Excerpted from Growing Grateful by Mary A. Kassian, copyright Mary A. Kassian.

Around Thanksgiving should not be the only time that we stop to give thanks to God. Every day, several times a day, we should stop to give thanks for what God has done, is doing, and promises to do in our life. Indeed we should be grateful for every breath and heartbeat! Love God! Love others!

Pastor Dale

Notes of Faith October 20, 2022

Notes of Faith October 20, 2022

Light Up the Day

You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.

— Matthew 5:14

Have you ever noticed how artwork on display in a museum or gallery seems to sparkle with life in a way that reproduced images of those same pieces never could? Almost as if the colors dance on the canvas in a choreography of vibrancy and vitality. While great works of art are preserved through careful maintenance, the lighting is what allows our eyes to appreciate the fullness of their beauty. Gallerists consult with lighting experts and pay for special bulbs, lenses, and filters, which are placed strategically throughout their spaces, so the pieces can be seen in the best light, literally.

The lighting helps you distinguish nuances of color you can’t see as easily, or at all. It controls glare and brings out the subtleties of the stroke work; according to the experts, the lighting is what brings the work to life. It’s what allows us to see the true and total beauty of the artist’s creation.

Jesus called His people “the light of the world” (Matthew 5:14). In a way, it’s like we’re those special bulbs, and God has strategically placed us in a position of prominence “on a hill.”

You were designed to draw out the best in others, to highlight their beauty, to show off their full potential.

Today, think of yourself as that light (because you are!). You were designed to draw out the best in others, to highlight their beauty, to show off their full potential.

Living this out is simple: notice the best in others and call attention to it.

“You have the kindest personality. Did you know that?”

“You work so hard every day, and we appreciate you.”

“I just love your smile.”

The little things you notice might just make for the brightest moments of someone else’s day.

You were designed to draw out the best in others, to highlight their beauty, to show off their full potential in Christ.

Excerpted from The Creative Soul Within, copyright Zondervan.

Love God, love others . . . sounds easy . . . keep trying!

Pastor Dale